In advance, thanks for understanding.

I will preface this post with this warning: between my crazy-insane hormones, and being separated from my newborn, I am a cranky mess right now. It’s true. So thanks in advance for the understanding. And if you take this post personally, check your emotions at the door and and put yourself in my shoes. I’m probably not talking about you anyway. On to my point:

I know that my wonderful friends and family have the best of intentions, but the constant “How is Bennett doing?” and “When is he coming home?” are—quite honestly—a bit overwhelming. I’ve had my phone on vibrate since his birth, and there is not a time that I check it and I don’t have a missed call or text. Do you know where I am all day? At the hospital. Holding, feeding, and getting to know my sweet boy.

I know that my friends/family sincerely care about Bennett’s well-being, and the inquiries come from the best of places (really! I do!)—but I can’t deal with them right now, let alone respond to each individual. So don’t be offended or take it personally if I don’t respond. This is my time to be “present” at the hospital, and just stare at his beautiful little face all day if I want to. This is my time to be selfish. Especially since Jon went back to Georgia yesterday, and ESPECIALLY because I actually have no idea when Bennett will be home, which is upsetting enough to repeat several times per day.

So, to our amazing friends and family: please trust that I will keep you informed about our sweet boy if something big changes. Check my personal Facebook if we’re “friends,” or subscribe to my blog by email to get email notifications of new posts (it’s on the left side under “stay tuned”), both of which I will keep updated with any news of progress or setbacks. I am certainly not one to keep good news to myself, and I will most assuredly let everyone know when we have and “ETA” for when he’ll be coming home!!! On to an update:

As I mentioned in my last post, we are still working on perfecting Bennett’s feedings. Being a preemie, it’s very normal to have issues coordinating the “suck, swallow, breathe” pattern. Whenever he feeds by mouth (the alternative being the feeding tube in his nose), his respiratory rate sometimes increases and he makes a “crowing” sound (as the nurses call it) when he breathes, or a “stridor.” He had a consult yesterday with Speech Therapy, and they suggested an Ear, Nose, Throat consult just to make sure there aren’t any physiological issues causing him to make the “crowing” sound. They will probably observe him today and make suggestions. Best case scenario, it’s nothing. Worst case scenario, he could need surgery. But I’m not even going to think about that until AFTER the consult. (Which is exactly why I don’t want to keep people informed about every little thing!) The nurses seem to think it’s perfectly normal and the doctors are just being cautious.

Anyhow, here is a dose of cuteness for your day. Thanks again for the understanding.

Holding Bennett the first time | 1 week old, 5lbs 6oz | Adorable

Mallory - August 15, 2013 - 11:37 am

Ugh, I love you Nicole! I’m here if you ever need anything love. You’re such a good mama and I’m so proud of you.

Hang in there, Bennett is just beautiful <3

Angie @ Pint of Goals - August 15, 2013 - 4:11 pm

I felt similarly when I was overdue. You know everyone has good intentions but it’s hard to not get annoyed. You explained that dichotomy well in this post!
Bennett is such a strong little man! I hope you get (or got) good news about the crowing thing.

Kelsey Wichelman - August 16, 2013 - 6:38 am

Congrats on that beautiful baby boy, i can’t believe how much he looks like his big sister :) i wanted to tell you, my cousin has close to the same story as you, her little boy had a hard time with the latching and feeding on his own as well, after lots of consults she finally decided to think outside the box and had a chiropractor come in, all it took was a little lining up from the chiropractor and he was latching and feeding good by that night. Good luck with everything!!

Nicole | Life So Lovely - August 16, 2013 - 8:29 pm

I’ll try anything at this point! I just want that sweet boy home. =)